User blog:Ultimate Mega Gamer/Ultimate Mega Gamer Bellyflops into DEATH BATTLE

(Cue Crush 40 - What I'm Made Of) Wiz: Three things in life are an absolute certainty.

Boomstick: Heartbreak, death & that the Ultimate Mega Gamer will kick your ass in any video game you can think of.

Wiz: In 1999, Bradley W. Nunn was born to his two parents in the strange land of Australia.

Boomstick: ''Ahh, Australia. The land of infinite booze, boxing kangaroos & insanely stupid rednecks.''

Wiz: Actually Boomstick, I believe that what we call rednecks here in America is what the Australians would refer to as Bogans.

Boomstick: Either way, it's a place I'd love to be.

Wiz: Young Bradley was an average child living in an average place with nothing special to come his way until the day he picked up a Nintendo 64.

Boomstick: ''That was a very important day for Bradley. It was the day he began to play Video Games. Something that would become very familiar to Bradley.''

Wiz: ''From that fateful day. Bradley played any game he could get his hands on & before long he became a champion at, well, every one of them.''

Boomstick: ''From the simple Kirby all the way up to ball crushing Dark Souls. Bradley could pick up any game & master it in a matter of days.''

Wiz: By the time he was 16 years old, having been inspired by YouTube stars such as JonTron, NerdCubed & Markiplier, Bradley decided to take his skill to YouTube.

Boomstick: ''But to do this he needed a name, something that would represent his immense skill in Video Games. From that day on, Bradley W. Nunn was no more. He became.. The Ultimate Mega Gamer. What a stupid name, who even comes up with that sort of shi-''

Wiz: ''Ultimate Mega Gamer took his skills to YouTube, providing his opinions & showing off his skill. He was happy doing what he was doing but this all came to an end when he first met what would become his lifelong enemy: technical difficulties.''

(Cue Rayman 2: The Great Escape - Overworld Theme)

Boomstick:'' Oh are you kidding me? Superman gets hit with a green rock & he goes down. The Iron Man suit runs out of power & Stark's in trouble but this guy gets put out of commission if his HDMI gets unplugged or the hard drive on his computer crashes?''

Wiz: ''Ultimate Mega Gamer was having fun making YouTube videos for a virtually non existent audience until he made the mistake of upgrading his laptop to Windows 10. With this upgrade Mega lost the only editing tool he had at his disposal: Windows Movie Maker.''

Boomstick: Wh- What?

Wiz:'' It's true. Mega upgraded to Windows 10 & lost his ability to make videos.''

Boomstick: ''And that's the tragedy in this guy's backstory. What a loser.''

(Cue Splatoon - Splattack!)

Wiz'': While it's true that Mega could never fully recover from the attack from Windows 10. He remained an insanly skilled gamer.''

Boomstick: Before he was 10 years old, Mega could guide his Grandfather through a level of Super Mario World, collecting every secret, over the phone.

Wiz: ''He has beaten multiple of the worlds hardest games & several easier games several times over & beat the powerful UTF in fisticuffs to a draw, two different times. He has beaten Sonic the Hedgehog 2006 twice. To put this into perspective, one of the world's most popular gaming YouTube channels: the Game Grumps couldn't achieve this feat once.''

Boomstick: And aside from his weakness to computers going haywire Mega's not very productive.

Wiz: ''Mega's prefers to spend his time gaming which has turned him into a very skilled procrastinator. Mega can't get through much of his school work before turning to YouTube or video games.''

Boomstick: Mega constantly has schoolwork to do that is either handed in late or never handed in at all.

Wiz: But put him in front of a video game console & challenge the Ultimate Mega Gamer & you'll have just made a big mistake.

Boomstick: ''He'll beat you, berate you & humiliate you. All just to prove he's better then you. And you know what? He is.''

Ultimate Mega Gamer'': If it's a challenge you want, it's a challenge you'll get, followed by a major ass whooping. Bring it on!''