Jotaro VS Kenshiro

Jotaro VS Kenshiro is the 90th episode of DEATH BATTLE!, featuring a battle between two of the most popular hard-hitting Manga/Anime protagonists, Jotaro Kujo from JoJo's Bizarre Adventure and Kenshiro from Fist of the North Star.

Description
Manliness has never looked so good. Two warriors enter, and only one will leave alive!

Interlude
(Cues: Wiz & Boomstick - Brandon Yates)

Wiz: We've covered a lot of macho heroes here on Death Battle, but these two are as manly and stoic as they come.

'''Boomstick: It's all in those sweet ass jackets. I mean, I-I guess they're pretty badass too.'''

Wiz: Jotaro Kujo, the delinquent turned hero from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure.

'''Boomstick: And Kenshiro, the wandering fist of the north star. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.'''

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills, to find out who would win... a Death Battle.

Jotaro
Wiz: As a teenager, Jotaro Kujo was a fairly infamous troublemaker.

'''Boomstick: But you can just call him "Jojo" like his friends do. Get it? JOtaro KuJO?'''

Wiz: How...bizarre.

Popup: His bad attitude is often attributed to the absence of his father, who was touring as a jazz musician throughout Jotaro's childhood.

Boomstick: While being a high school hoodlum isn't usually a good idea, it worked out great for him, cause he toughed up a lot.

Wiz: At the age of seventeen, Jotaro was arrested for brutally pummeling four known gang members, who were armed with knives and nunchucks of all things, with apparently his bare fists, but Jotaro had a bigger problem, he didn't know how he did it.

'''Boomstick: He knew he was tough, but not that tough, so he came to the only conclusion that makes sense: He was possessed by an evil spirit! (makes ghostly noises).'''

Wiz: Just like my pet rat!

Boomstick: Yeah, wait, is that why he's been scratching pentagrams all over his cage?

Wiz: You'll find out. But then, Jotaro did something absolutely crazy, to prove his theory, he swiped a police officers gun, pointed it straight at his head, and fired.

Boomstick: And that's how he died, just kidding, a third arm popped out of his body to stop the bullet, of course!

Wiz: This strange being attached to Jotaro wasn't an evil spirit at all, it's an entity physically generated by Jotaro himself, and inherited through his bloodline.

Boomstick: Yeah, lots of the Jojo family has 'em, including his granddad Joseph.

Wiz: These beings are called Stands, literally because they stand by you.

Boomstick: (groans) I mean, I guess it's not wrong.

Wiz: It's so lame!

Boomstick: Stands are powered by their users life force, and turns out, Jotaro's life force is supercharged, because he's got one of the strongest Stands of all, Star Platinum.

Wiz: Star Platinum has superhuman strength, speed, precision, and vision. He can even phase through bodies and effect the persons inner organs. Plus, while Star Platinum can take a solid hit, most Stands can only be damaged by other Stands or Stand users.

Boomstick: So, he's basically invincible unless he's fighting another Stand?

Wiz: Exactly, in fact, unless you have a Stand of your own, you wouldn't even be able to see Star Platinum.

Boomstick: Oh great, so he's invincible and invisible.

''Popup: Some Stands, such as Strength the Cargo Ship, are visible to ordinary people. However, these circumstances are dependent on the Stand and not the viewers abilities.''

Wiz: And when you combine all that with Jotaro's fighting skills and exceptional cleverness, they make a magnificent team.

Kenshiro
Wiz: It's the last decade of the 20th century, and the world has been ruined. In this apocalyptic age, the strong survive and the weak kneel. Only one man challenges this new society, and fortunately he has the literal power to do it.

Boomstick: Kenshiro, Fist of the North Star.

Wiz: Like most important protagonists, Kenshiro began his journey to greatness as a young orphan.

Boomstick: Lucky for him, he eventually met old man Ryuken, who was a pretty cool dude, ended up adopting Kenshiro, along with a few other kids.

Wiz: He was also the 63rd Denshosha.

'''Boomstick: Don't shoot what? It's not safety.'''

Wiz: A grandmaster of an ancient Chinese martial art called Hokuto Shinken. While anyone can learn the basics of this dangerous fighting style, there can only ever be one grandmaster for each generation.

'''Boomstick: So that's what Kenshiro set out to be, and with patience, training and plenty of muscle building, he was named the next successor of Hakuna Mata-shin. Too bad his adopted brother got pissed he wasn't chosen and killed Ryuken over it. Talk about a sore loser.'''

Wiz: With Hokuto Shinken mastered, Kenshiro can focus his energy into his strikes, effectively killing an opponent with a single blow to their pressure points. There are 708 malleable pressure points in then human body and striking any of them can cause all sorts of effects: stunning, blinding, healing, restoring memories, making people walk backward...

'''Boomstick: But mostly, they just make people explode! Anyway, things started looking pretty great for Kenny, he even got engaged, hut then nuclear war broke out and turned the Earth into Mad Max land. Kenshiro's fiance got kidnapped, and this guy used his knife fingers to draw a nifty big dipper on Kenshiro's chest. Seriously, how is he not dead after that?'''

Wiz: Miraculously, Kenshiro survived and began his wayward journey, wandering the wasteland searching for revenge.

Boomstick: And if we go by how many people he blew up, I'd say he got plenty of it.

Wiz: He really does leave a big mess behind, I can't even imagine what it must be like to clean up after one of his fights.

Boomstick: You should see Mr. Snappy on taco night.

Death Battle
(*Cues: Werewolf Therewolf - Bizarre Stars)

(Note: The characters speak Japanese, but their dialogue can be seen through subtitles)

Jotaro Kujo and his grandfather, Joseph Joestar, pass a dead squirrel as they walk in the desert and come across a pyramid. They hear an engine in the distance, revealed to be Kenshiro driving his car up to them.

Joseph: OH NOOO!

Kenshiro stops his vehicle right in front of the JoJo duo and forms a large dust cloud. Jotaro scoffs as he tips his cap downwards.

Jotaro: Who are you?

Kenshiro leaps from his car in front of the family as he has a menacing aura surrounding him. Joseph starts growling at the enemy, but his grandson places his hand in front of him.

Jotaro: Wait old man!

Jotaro then glares at the mysterious man and points at him.

Jotaro: If you wanna go, I'll take you on.

Kenshiro starts cracking his knuckles and gets into his fighting stance.

''Kenshiro: Pick the place. It will be where you die.''

Jotaro: You've got some balls!

Joseph backs up and starts running off as the two warriors face each other.

FIGHT!

Kenshiro tries punching Jotaro, but Star Platinum blocks the punch, much to the former's confusion. Star Platinum then uppercuts Kenshiro into the nearby pyramid. Kenshiro leaps off the pyramid and prepares an aerial kick as Jotaro leaps towards him.

Jotaro: Star Platinum, The World!

Jotaro avoids Kenshiro's kick and warps past him. The confused Kenshiro is knocked to the ground by Star Platinum. Kenshiro enhances his vision and manages to see Jotaro's stand behind him. The road warrior and stand then get into a fist flurry and counter each other blow for blow. Finally, Star Platinum wins out and lands a punch on Kenshiro's face before sending him flying with a powerful haymaker.

The stand performs his Star Finger technique to finish, but Kenshiro jumps out of the way before retaliating with a blast of Tōki aimed at Jotaro. Star Platinum intercepts and protects him. Kenshiro opts to fire a wave of Tōki this time, but once again, Star Platinum stands in the way to shield Jotaro before lunging forward with another punch. However, Kenshiro forms his mirages and evades the attack, with Joseph in the background responding with-

Joseph: HOLY SHIT!

The mirages leap forward and rush at Star Platinum, who manages to fend them off while Jotaro backs away from the action. However, amidst the action, the real Kenshiro leaps at Jotaro, now defenseless, and thrusts his arm for a deadly strike. Jotaro manages to lean back and avoid the attack, and any further follow-ups are stopped when Star Platinum grabs Kenshiro and throws him, but he lands on his feet and joins his mirages. They leap forward once more and all perform the Tenha Kassatsu, firing beams of Tōki from their fingers. Star Platinum is unaffected as per usual, while Jotaro dodges the rest. He then returns-

Jotaro: Star Platinum!

-to his side and performs another Time Stop just before he can be struck with the Tōki beams, freezing all but the young JoJo and his stand in place. Joseph throws in another wonderful cry of Engrish, cut short by the stopping of time.

Joseph: OH MY GOOO-

Jotaro steps away from the beams and Star Platinum locates the real Kenshiro. He then places his hand around his heart, preparing to crush it. However, the 5 seconds of the Time Stop have almost elapsed.

Jotaro: Time's about to move.

Indeed, the Time Stop runs out and time returns to its normal speed, also allowing Joseph to finish saying "OH MY GOOO-"

Joseph: -OOOD!!!!!!!

The beams aimed at Jotaro miss completely and Star Platinum clenches his fist to crush Kenshiro's heart. However, Kenshiro uses Musō Tensei and phases away from the fatal blow, appearing behind Jotaro. The Fist of the North Star then famously declares to Jotaro:

Kenshiro: You are already dead.

A flashback occurs and it is revealed that when Kenshiro attempted to strike Jotaro, he was just barely able to tap the stand user's chest. But that tap was all that was needed as Star Platinum fades away and Jotaro's body starts convulsing. As every one of Kenshiro's victims have said before, Jotaro says in shock:

Jotaro: WHAT!?

-before finally exploding, leaving nothing but his blood on the ground. Joseph looks on in horror as Kenshiro grunts and walks away. Joseph screams one final line:

Joseph: SON OF A BITCH!!

K.O!

Kenshiro continues walking away, leaving Joseph to mourn the death of his grandson, whose spirit in the afterlife simply tips his hat down and says "Yare yare."

...

Kenshiro: You're already dead.

Jotaro's face begins to show signs of exploding, and Star Platinum fades away.

Jotaro: What!?

Just then, Jotaro blows up, killing the Stardust Crusader as Joseph looks in shock.

Joseph: SON OF A BITCH!

KO!

Kenshiro walks away while Joseph cries over his dead grandson's pool of blood. While Joseph is mourning, Jotaro's ghost appears.

Jotaro: Good grief...

Results
Wiz: The winner is Kenshiro.

Trivia

 * This is the first fight in a Death Battle episode to feature a JoJo's Bizarre Adventure character and a Fist of the North Star character.
 * This is the 5th fight to have been a One Minute Melee before it was a Death Battle, the other 4 being Hercule Satan VS Dan Hibiki, Natsu VS Ace, Lucario VS Renamon and Sephiroth VS Vergil.
 * This is the fourth episode to feature an anime character fighting another anime character, the previous three being Zoro VS Erza, Natsu VS Ace and Naruto VS Ichigo.