Crash VS Spyro

Crash VS Spyro is the 91st episode of DEATH BATTLE!, featuring former PlayStation mascots and longtime rivals, Crash Bandicoot from the video game series of the same name and Spyro the Dragon from the Spyro series. Spyro was voiced by Edward Bosco.

Description
The ultimate rivalry of two classic PlayStation mascots comes to a head!

Interlude
(Cues: Wiz & Boomstick - Brandon Yates)

Wiz: The early 1990's played host to one of the biggest battlegrounds the world had ever seen, the console wars.

Boomstick: Nintendo and Sega's mascots were locked in a merciless duel over the gaming throne.

Wiz: But when the smoke cleared, a surprise third challenger was rising to the top.

Boomstick: The Sony PlayStation, and it didn't have just one mascot, it had two.

Wiz: Crash Bandicoot, the mutated marsupial from down under.

'''Boomstick: And Spyro the Dragon, the powerful purple hero of the dragon realm. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.'''

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle.

Crash
Wiz: Listen, I admire another brilliant doctor of science as much as the next guy, especially those with grand plans to take over the world, but I'm not sure Doctor Neo Cortex makes the cut.

'''Boomstick: Why not? He's an evil genius who made a mutant Aussie army of animals to take over the world.'''

Wiz: Sure, but when it came time to assign a general for this "army", Cortex chose, of all things, a bandicoot.

'''Boomstick: A bandi-what? You're making that up.'''

Wiz: It's a real animal, look!

(shows a picture of a real bandicoot)

Boomstick: Aw, hey, it's kinda cute, how's that little thing gonna take over the world?

Wiz: With the Evolvo-Ray, Cortex did successfully mutate it into a powerful beast. However, when he tried to brainwash the creature, he utterly failed to create his fearsome general, instead, he got Crash Bandicoot.

Boomstick: So, Cortex threw him out like trash, and Crash became his worst nemesis ever, which is super embarrassing, cause this bandi-Crash is a few snacks short of a barbie, but his physical abilities make up for it, he's got parkour skills like nobody's business.

Wiz: Which is appropriate, as bandicoots are excellent jumpers, similar to their marsupial cousin, the kangaroo.

Boomstick: He's got superhuman strength, and can take a big hit and just keep on going, like an energizer bunny of pain!

Wiz: Crash can double jump in mid-air, slide incredible distances, and use Crash Dash to boost his speed.

'''Boomstick: He's also tapped into Mojo, a magical substance that's basically life energy, to enhance his battle techniques. He's got his Norris roundhouse and triple dragon, but his favorite move is the Cyclone Spin.'''

Popup: While Mojo is said to be the "essence of life itself", it may also contain nuts.

Wiz: He can even give this move a boost for the Death Tornado technique, though this can leave him dizzy and prone to counterattacks. Still, these brutal moves proved incredibly useful for rescuing his fellow mutant bandicoot girlfriend, Tawna.

'''Boomstick: Oh, why does she look like that? She's like, really hot, but also not at the same time, I'm really confused.'''

Wiz: Uh-huh, while Crash's natural abilities were enough to save her, his future battles with Cortex would require more sophisticated tools.

'''Boomstick: Yeah, like the rad Copter Pack, he's even got himself the unicorn of motor sports, the Space Motorcycle. What I wouldn't give for one of those...'''

Wiz: To increase his firepower, he carries a special bazooka that uses a naturally occurring and easily obtainable form of ammunition, Wumpa Fruit.

Boomstick: The same kind of fruit shooter that's on his power loader suit from "Alien", er, uh, I mean, this completely generic looking mech.

Popup: In the Japanese release of Crash Bandicoot, Wumpa Fruit was actually referred to as apples.

Wiz: But why fruit? I can't imagine it's a particularly effective projectile.

'''Boomstick: I don't know, Wiz, remember that time I shot you with my potato gun? Ah, you were stuck in a coma for like, a month.'''

Wiz: Wait, what? You told me I lost that month because my time travel wristwatch finally worked.

'''Boomstick: Oh, uh, heh, well, where's Crash getting all this cool tech? He can't be building it himself, he's pretty dumb.'''

Wiz: Their all thanks to his kid sister, Coco, who's ten times the inventor Cortex is, but Crash isn't really dumb, he just lacks communication skills, he actually shows many symptoms of autism. Some people with autism, known as savants, are extraordinarily gifted in particular skill sets, and I think that describes Crash perfectly. While he may not know how to hold a conversation, he is a superb athlete and puzzle solver.

Boomstick: Well, I'm sure it helps that he's surrounded by friends who encourage his better traits.

(Crash lets off a belch)

Coco: Hey, that was a good one!

(Crash chuckles)

'''Boomstick: Like Aku Aku, his magical mask foster dad who's basically a god. Lucky bastard.'''

Wiz: Aku Aku's magical mojo prowess is quite impressive, he's very protective of Crash and will often step in when Crash is in trouble, but not always.

Boomstick: Wiz, why can he teleport across dimensions on his own, but can't teleport Crash very far at all?

Aku Aku: This is as far as I can take us, we'll have to fight our way to the robot's interior and save your sister!

Wiz: Well, perhaps his fatherly intuition is kicking in, encouraging Crash to learn from his own mistakes and become his own man, er, bandicoot.

Boomstick: Yeah, maybe he's just being a dick.

''Popup: He can jack Titans because they are made of Mojo. He cannot jack other creatures.''

Wiz: Well, thanks to Aku Aku and his own amazing abilities, Crash has performed some incredible feats while stopping Cortex's plans time and time again.

'''Boomstick: He's strong enough to lift his adopted brother Crunch over his head. Since Crunch is at least twice as big as Crash, that would mean Crash's strength is similar to the world's best power lifter.'''

Wiz: His Cyclone Attack can generate enough force to lift this large boulder and throw it so hard, it shatters on impact. Comparing its size to Crash, that boulder must weigh nearly eight tons.

Boomstick: He's also fast enough to outrun polar bears, which can move up to 25 miles per hour, but Crash really shines when it comes to durability, just look at how well he holds up after taking 112 falling wooden crates to the face.

Wiz: Huh, where do they all come from?

Boomstick: I bet it's Aku Aku's fault, and he's right back up, like it didn't even happen, what a champ!

Wiz: Crash has endured an explosion of twenty three crates of TNT all at once, which, given their size, could potentially level a city block, and with the help of Aku Aku, he even survived a crash landing from outer space.

Boomstick: What the heck is up with his hair?

Wiz: This vessel was likely falling at 17,500 miles per hour, similar to the space shuttle's typical reentry, which means the force of it's collision would be equivalent to more than two million tons of TNT.

Boomstick: Wait, but why didn't Aku Aku just teleport them to safety?

Aku Aku: I can't believe we're okay!

'''Boomstick: Oh, are you kidding me, Aku? You know what you did, er, didn't do! But what's the saying? "Any crash you can walk away from", right? Plus, given how easy it is for Crash's enemies to lure him into traps, his absurd durability is crucial.'''

Wiz: Well, Crash isn't perfect, but with his amazing abilities, and a little bit of Mojo, he's saved the whole world many times over.

Boomstick: And after years of this, he even finally learned how to speak.

Coco: Now let's go home, and eat pancakes!

Crash: PANCAKES!

(He looks at the screen for a few seconds and smiles, fade to black)

Boomstick: Wait, that's it?!

Spyro
Wiz: Prophecy tells of a special purple dragon born every ten generations, destined to be a hero of his age, this was the legend of Spyro. But, when the ancient dark master Malefor learned of this, he swore to destroy Spyro before he even hatched.

'''Boomstick: By the way, there are at least three different timelines for Spyro, but we're mainly sticking with the "Legend of Spyro" version, because he can do pretty much anything the other ones can, and more. Plus, I think they're all the same Spyro reincarnated anyway, since that's what the prophecy says, and look, that's totally Skylands being made at the end of Dawn of the Dragon.'''

Wiz: Ahem, wild fan theories aside, Spyro was saved from Malefor's wrath by Ignitus, a Guardian dragon. He decided to pull a Moses and send Spyro's egg floating down a river to who knows where. Okay, why do so many stories start with people just throwing babies into rivers? That's never a good idea!

'''Boomstick: Wrong, Wiz! It worked out fine for Spyro, he was found and adopted by a family of Dragonflies, and even without fellow dragons around, Spyro grew up to be a pretty good fighter. He's strong, tough, and makes good use of his horns, tail, and claws.'''

Wiz: But not his wings, not yet. Without a dragon's parentage, Spyro remained mostly grounded during his childhood.

Boomstick: But he got pretty good at using his head, like, the fun way, not the brainy stuff, you do not wanna be on the other end of his charge attack.

Wiz: But one fateful day, everything changed. During a game of hide and seek with his quote on qoute "brother", Sparx, they got into a bit of monkey business, and in desperation, Spyro unexpectedly breathed fire, this was Spyro's first hint that he was, (gasps) adopted!

'''Boomstick: Hold up! You mean he thought he was an actual dragonfly the whole time? I can think of a few other hints, like, uh, I don't know, any time he saw his reflection!'''

Wiz: This "revelation" prompted Spyro to go on a journey in search of his true home among other dragons, oh, and Sparx tagged along to help find treasure and protect his dragon brother from harm.

'''Boomstick: Not like he needed it, he's the chosen one, bitch! He's got a bunch of awesome dragon powers!'''

Wiz: As a purple dragon, Spyro was not limited to just his fire breath, after finding and rescuing four great dragon guardians, they each became his teachers in the arts of elemental combat.

''Sparx: Hey, Spyro. What was that about?''

''Spyro: I don't really know. I just felt like I had to hit it. And when i did, the power of a thosuand suns surged through my body!''

Spyro: You gotta believe!

''Spyro: It's a sad sight, Sparx. Another noble warrior falls victim to the plague of love. Just look away.''

Death Battle
''Spyro: Weird.. Uh, what are you doing?''

Just then, Sparx comes out and flies to Crash. Crash seems surprised, but then thinks that Sparx is an enemy. Not even a second later, Crash claps his hands on Sparx, killing him. Crash laughs, while Spyro looks on in horror.

''Spyro: SPARX! No!!!''

(Cues: Crash And Burn - Brandon Yates)

Enraged, Spyro then flies to Crash, the latter preparing a fighting stance. The PlayStation mascots then collide head-on, prepared for battle.

FIGHT!

Spyro: Alright...

Crash does his victory dance while Spyro flies up in the air.

Spyro: You asked for it!

Spyro then unleashes his Fire Breath on the bandicoot as he shrieks and braces himself before Aku Aku appears to shield Crash from the Fire Breath before disappearing. Crash then runs up a mountain and jumps as he prepares to punch Spyro out of the air but the Purple Dragon makes a fiery explosion that sends the Orange Bandicoot crashing towards the ground as he lands on his back before getting back up just as Spyro fires multiple fireballs at Crash while he is running away from them. As Crash was running, he then notices his Mech Suit and runs towards it.

Crash Bandicoot jumps into the Mech Suit and starts to operate it, Crash points Mech's arm cannon towards Spyro and shoots out a Wumpa Fruit at Spyro, the Dragon dodges the fruit and it ends up splashing on a Rock.

Spyro: Wait a sec, was that a fruit?

Crash Bandicoot shoots more Wumpa Fruits at Spyro, who keeps dodging them all. Each shot of Wumpa Fruits pushes Crash to edge, Spyro used his Ice Breath to freeze the Mech Suit, then Spyro covers himself in a spiky rock and charges towards the frozen Bandicoot and knocking him off the edge.

Spyro: Woohoo, strike!

Suddenly, Crash flies up with a jetpack on his back.

Spyro: Where do you keep finding these things?

Dark Spyro: I'm done with this!

Dark Spyro: Nobody messes with me, pal.

Results
(Cues: Crash And Burn again)

Boomstick: Huh, I don't think Aku Aku's, gonna pull Crash from the grave after that.

Wiz: Spyro had plenty of obvious advantages. His speedy flight let him control the pace of the battle, and his elemental arsenal gave him a much wider variety of attacks than Crash had ever seen in a one-on-one fight. Even with his extraordinary puzzle-solving skills Crash was simply overwhelmed. But surprisingly, this wasn't nearly as one-sided as it looked on paper.

'''Boomstick: With the strength to throw an 8-ton boulder, Crash was actually stronger than Spyro, and both of them have survived impacts worth around two millions tons of force. How convenient. It's almost like they planned this all along!'''

Wiz: To be fair, we did have to lowball Spyro's durability against the golem's punch. However, both of them have shown durability which far exceeded much of their attack capability.

'''Boomstick: So even with his gadgets, Crash really didn't have a good way to hurt Spyro very much, but the funny thing is Spyro didn't have many attacks that could firmly hurt Crash, either. They were both just too tough.'''

Wiz: Well, until Spyro used the aether breath, which could literally break matter apart at an atomic level. Not even Aku Aku could save Crash from a beam that intense.

Boomstick: I guess Crash just couldn't spin this one.

Wiz: The winner is Spyro the Dragon.

Trivia

 * The connection between Crash and Spyro is that they are both iconic animal-based video game characters and former PlayStation mascots from the 90s. They also have a rivalry comparable to the ones between Mario and Sonic the Hedgehog and/or Ratchet & Clank and Jak & Daxter.
 * This is the first Death Battle episode to be written by Sean Hinz.
 * This is the fifth episode in which only one side received a voice actor, with the previous four being Mario VS Sonic, Eggman VS Wily, Hulk VS Doomsday and Lucario VS Renamon.
 * This is the 15th Death Battle where both combatants are from the same company, with the previous 14 being Goomba VS Koopa, Haggar VS Zangief, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Battle Royale, Starscream VS Rainbow Dash, Zelda VS Peach, Pokémon Battle Royale, Ragna VS Sol Badguy, Beast VS Goliath, Darth Vader VS Doctor Doom, Bowser VS Ganon, Ratchet & Clank VS Jak & Daxter, Meta VS Carolina, Naruto VS Ichigo and Jotaro VS Kenshiro.
 * This is the 12th Death Battle where two animals are fighting each other, with the previous 11 being Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Battle Royale, Zitz VS Leonardo, Yoshi VS Riptor, Fox McCloud VS Bucky O'Hare, Pokémon Battle Royale, Godzilla VS Gamera, Donkey Kong VS Knuckles, Pokémon VS Digimon, Mewtwo VS Shadow, Lucario VS Renamon and Smokey Bear VS McGruff the Crime Dog.
 * Coincidentally, the Spyro Reignited Trilogy was announced/leaked a week before the battle had been released.
 * During the fight while Crash uses his jetpack, he mimicks Ken Masters critical art from Street Fighter V: Guren Enjinkyaku