Roshi VS Jiraiya

Roshi VS Jiraiya is the 102nd episode of Death Battle, featuring Master Roshi from the Dragon Ball series and Jiraiya from the Naruto series in a battle of the old and perverted anime masters. Roshi was voiced by Patrick Rodriguez, Jiraiya was voiced by Jonah Scott and Gamabunta was voiced by Steven Kelly.

Description
Two powerful, prolific, and weirdly perverted masters of martial arts battle it out!

Interlude
(*Cues: Wiz & Boomstick - Brandon Yates*)

Wiz: The finest warriors are never developed on their own, while some are simply molded by their enemies, the best usually seek the wisdom of a master.

'''Boomstick: Who, for some reason, is a weird old pervert. Like Roshi, turtle hermit and teacher to Dragon Ball's greatest hero.'''

Wiz: And Jiraiya, the toad sage and instructor to the most famous ninja of all.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle.

Master Roshi
Wiz: Goku is, without a doubt, one of the greatest martial arts champions of all time.

'''Boomstick: Well, yeah! He's good enough to rival gods, become a Super Saiyan, and even master Ultra Instinct.'''

Wiz: But he never would've achieved any of it without the guidance of Master Roshi.

'''Boomstick: A martial artist who's so powerful, there's only one thing in the world that can stop him. Well, uh, two things, really, if you get what I mean.'''

(Roshi tries to grope Launch, she loads and primes a gun.)

Launch: I know your game, old man, and I don't wanna play!

(She fires as Roshi screams.)

Boomstick: Anyway, when he was a hip youngin, Roshi studied under the legendary Master Potato-

Wiz: Mutaito.

'''Boomstick: -And a kitty cat! These masters of ass-whooping taught Roshi how to weaponize his own life energy, or ki.'''

Wiz: Similar to many real life Chinese martial arts, ki is the vital energy all living beings possess. The stronger and more focused you are, the greater your ki becomes.

Boomstick: Roshi can use his ki to increase his power, pushing past his physical limits with a bunch of awesome techniques, he can fire explosive shots, go buff mode, stun foes with Thunder Shock Surprise, and even seal dangerous enemies away with the Evil Containment Wave.

Wiz: It wasn't long until Roshi refined these techniques and created his own martial arts style, Turtle School.

'''Boomstick: (Singing to the tune of the TMNT theme) Creepy old man turtle school, creepy old man turtle school, Roshi in a half shell, he's a turtle...man. No, it's not about beating people up as slow as you can, like I first thought. Turtle School, or Kame style, includes everything from tricky pressure point combat to a phony drunken style, which, if you ask me, is just a missed opportunity to get wasted.'''

Wiz: By delivering milk up a mountain, plowing a field with bare hands, working construction with simple tools, and being chased by both sharks and bees, all while wearing a fifty pound shell, Roshi's martial art focuses on breaking "the wall of humanity" in every way, except for one.

(Roshi stands on a railing on Korin Tower, then turns.)

Roshi: (Translated) Oh, I forgot I can't fly!

(Korin and Yajirobe collapse in shock)

Wiz: Despite most of his students learning it at some point, flight is actually a technique developed by his rivals, the Crane School. Apparently, Roshi's just been a bit too stubborn to properly learn this skill, even after centuries of experience.

Boomstick: How long has he been doing this?

Wiz: Well, it's a little vague, but thanks to either a pet phoenix he accidentally killed, or the mysterious Paradise Herb, he's just shy of 360 years old.

''Popup: Roshi has also claimed he's drunk from the Fountain of Youth. This may be a metaphor, or perhaps he has accomplished three different methods of immortality. Either way, he doesn't seem to age at all!''

'''Boomstick: Damn! I'm just impressed he can still get it up for the girls after all that time!'''

Wiz: Boomstick, that's... well, I mean, yes, I guess medically speaking, it is quite impressive.

'''Boomstick: Where can I get me some of this paradise grass? I wanna be chasin' tail for centuries.'''

Wiz: Good luck with that, but with all of those years spent honing his talents, Roshi dedicated fifty of them to developing one revolutionary technique.

(cut to Wiz and Boomstick)

Boomstick: Ka-me-ha-me-ha!

(Nothing happens, Wiz looks)

Wiz: Anyway...

'''Boomstick: Ha! (he then pops open a beer and sprays Wiz with it) Ha-ha! Gotcha!'''

Wiz: (growls) Anyway...to be honest, "devastating" is an understatement.

''Popup: It took Roshi 50 years to perfect the Kamehameha, while Goku learned it in one day. This implies Roshi is not as naturally gifted in ki manipulation as some others, and more so relies on his creativity and ingenuity.''

'''Boomstick: Well yeah! He blew up a whole frigging mountain with it!'''

Wiz: This peak was inspired by the real life Flaming Mountains in China, standing up to 2,600 feet tall. With this in mind, we can find that to pulverize such a mountain, Roshi's Kamehameha must equal nearly four gigatons of TNT.

'''Boomstick: But that's small stuff compared to the time he obliterated the entire moon in about five seconds! That's gotta be worth what, like, ten, twenty mountains? Wiz, how many mountains make a moon?'''

''Popup: At first glance, Roshi's moon bust seems like an outlier compared to his other feats. However, scaled to other characters around him, it is perfectly reasonable.''

Wiz: Well, more like thirty five billion, to obliterate the moon in its entirety, the Kamehameha must have struck it with a force akin to three octillion tons of TNT.

'''Boomstick: That's, uh, twenty seven zeroes, by the way, holy shit! Roshi's also super fast, he can fight an entire battle in a blink of an eye.'''

(cut to Wiz and Boomstick)

Wiz: Which might seem crazy, but Roshi is also able to snatch bullets out of the air that are fired at him from point blank range.

Boomstick: That gun looks like a British Sten, which can fire up to six hundred rounds per minute, at a muzzle velocity of nearly 1,200 feet per second.

Wiz: That means Roshi would have to react to the first bullet within five milliseconds. Additionally, each consecutive bullet would reach him just shy of seventeen milliseconds apart. The maximum distance between any given shot looks to be about three feet, which means he would have to be moving at 180 feet per second in order to catch them all.

Boomstick: Ah, if my hands could move that fast, I'd finally stop getting married.

(Boomstick looks down as Wiz gestures in confusion)

Wiz: This speed is far from his limit, but Roshi's true talent is ensuring his students grow further and further than himself every day. Sadly, Roshi's frailty of age means his body can't always express just how powerful he really is.

Boomstick: And using too much Ki energy can cause all sorts of problems, like when his master Pistachio died using the Evil Containment Wave.

Wiz: But while Roshi's pupils may surpass him, he remains one of the smartest fighters on Earth.

'''Boomstick: He's tough enough to take down dozens of Frieza's soldiers, and survived a beat down from an alternate universe wannabe Frieza. He even took a barrage of death rays like a champ, the same move that killed Vegeta many many years ago.'''

Wiz: And in the Dragon Ball Super manga, Roshi has shown to be so collected in battle, his movements sort of emulate those of Ultra Instinct.

''Popup: The Super manga is a different continuity than the Super anime, which is the canon sequel to the Dragon Ball manga. Using this would violate the fourth rule of Death Battle.''

Boomstick: Yeah, that's not technically canon, but it does go to show how far Roshi's training can take him.

Wiz: And it's safe to say that this old, perverted, but genius of a man will never stop training.

Roshi: KAMEHAMEHA!

Jiraiya
Wiz: Among the ninja of the Hidden Leaf Village, few are quite as impressive as Naruto Uzumaki.

Boomstick: Yeah, I know that's crazy, cuz'...y'know, but not just anyone can fight aliens on the moon and become president of Hidden Valley Ranch.

Wiz: Naruto would become the Hidden Leafs greatest champion and seventh Hokage, but this would have never been possible without his training under the dynamic Toad Sage and Legendary Sannin; Jiraiya the Gallant.

(Camera cuts to Wiz and Boomstick.)

'''Boomstick: Gallant, huh? Hey Wiz, why do the most badass old dudes always turn out to be weird pervs?'''

Wiz: Uh, well, don't let his, ahem, crude demeanor fool you.

'''Boomstick: Oh, don't worry about me, Wiz, this ain't my first trip to Secret Leaf Ninja Town. Nothing surprises me anymore.'''

(Boomstick drinks a beer while Wiz presses a button on his mechanical arm, a naked female version of Wiz appears from smoke akin to Naruto's Sexy Jutsu. Boomstick bleeds out from the nose in surprise.)

Boomstick: What the fu-

(Static, camera glitches out to show "TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES" title card with a drunken Boomstick staggering by a film camera.)

(Camera returns to normal and back to the analysis.)

Boomstick: Um, anyway, Jiraiya originally learned the shinobi way from the Third Hokage, who taught him how to use his Chakra to do ninja magic.

Wiz: Similar to Ki, Chakra is a form of life energy. In Hindu and Buddhist theologies, Chakras are, in simplistic terms, gates within the human body which can be embraced to achieve enlightenment. However, in the world of Naruto, Chakra is used to perform amazing ninja techniques called Jutsus.

Boomstick: Gesundheit.

Wiz: Thank you, like most ninja, Jiraiya learned about four types of Jutsus; Taijutsu, or hand-to-hand combat, Ninjutsu, Harnessing Chakra as elemental weapons and tools, Genjutsu, which covers illusion and mental manipulation, and Senjutsu, a method of utilizing naturally occurring energy as an extension of one's self.

'''Boomstick: Jiraiya mastered as many styles as he could, and even learned one of the greatest Ninjutsu atacks out there, the Rasengan. With this, he gathers his Chakra into a spinning orb of death modelled off the ultra destructive Tailed-Beast Bomb, and that thing can wipe out a whole village all at once! And on the weird side, he can sharpen his Twisted Sister mane into a shield like a porcupine and fire the hairs out like a needle gun.'''

Wiz: Possessing a keen and mischevous mind, Jiraiya spent plenty of time developing brand new techniques, such as the invisibility jutsu, which you'd think would be perfect for stealth or assassination missions, but he actually developed it specifically for... uh...

'''Boomstick: Research! Where else is a self-respecting writer suppose to get his, ahem, "inspiration" from?'''

Popup: While there is no documented evidence that he's used invisibility in combat, he absolutely should be able to like others have.

Wiz: Clearly, Jiraya sometimes took his tinkering a bit too far. On one such occasion, he accidently teleported himself to a mystical land full of giant, talking toads.

Boomstick: Wiz, you sure Jutsu isn't just, like, another name for crack?

Wiz: After befriending the toads, Jiraiya trained under the sage, Fukasaku.

'''Boomstick: Where he learned a bunch of fire release techniques, like the Toad Oil Bullet, and Flame Bullet attacks. Now that's one impressive loogie!'''

Wiz: Jiraya entered a pact with the toads, learning their ways and summoning them to the field of battle. As his own talents relied on trickery over brute force, such as hiding in shadows and manipulating his opponents movements, the powerful toads were perfect allies. He can trap his foe inside a toad's throat, transform them into toads for interrogation, or even call a gigantic amphibian warrior to his side.

Boomstick: Like the biggest grump you've ever seen, Gamabunta.

Gamabunta: (to Naruto) I am the wise and powerful Lord Gamabunta, the chief toad, and you're an idiot, now SHUT UP!

'''Boomstick: Ha-ha! Ah, Bunta, you crotchety old toad.'''

Popup: While summoning can quickly drain chakra, Jiraiya has excellent chakra control and can always draw more energy to himself through Senjutsu.

Wiz: And through Fukasaku's teachings, Jiraiya perfected the art of Senjutsu. Through their combined efforts, he entered a new, mighty form called Sage Mode.

Boomstick: While it takes a long time to get into, Sage Mode Jiraiya can do all sorts of things he couldn't before.

Wiz: Like the unpredictable martial art, Frog Kata, and a deadly Genjutsu, the Demonic Illusion: Toad Confrontation Chant.

Boomstick: Which sounds weird, so why don't we just call it "You're F***ed" jutsu, cause if you get caught, your soul is trapped by these big guys who desperately wanna high five, leaving your physical body totally open to a swift kill.

Wiz: Sage Mode also enhances Jiraiya's other abilities, turning his normal Rasengan into the unstoppable Big Ball Rasengan, which, according to the official data books, is strong enough to carve away a mountain.

Boomstick: Wiz, he's way more than just a mountain smasher, Jiraiya is quick enough to fight some of the fastest ninja around, like Kakashi and Itachi, some of which are fast enough to intercept lightning.

Wiz: The leader of a lightning bolt moves around 220,000 miles per hour, putting ninja like Jiraiya at speeds of Mach 280.

Boomstick: Now I get why ninja are so awesome, who needs guns when your more than a hundred times faster than bullets?

Wiz: While Jiraiya isn't exactly the strongest or fastest ninja around, he's certainly one of the most clever. Over time, he rose to become a legendary ninja and hero of his people, hailed by the honorable title of Sannin.

''Popup: Itachi Uchiha claimed that if he fought Jiraiya without backing down, both of them would die, even with allies at Itachi's back. Itachi is one of the deadliest ninja to ever exist!''

Boomstick: And he's a gutsy one, like when he used his tricks to take out three of the six members of the emo rock band Pain, before they tore his arm off, crushed his throat, and impaled him five times.

Wiz: But even while suffering excruciating agony, Jiraiya proved strong enough to power through and send a vital message to his most promising pupil, paving the way for the next generation of heroes before being swept off his feet one last time.

Boomstick: You know, I guess he was a pretty gallant guy after all.

''Jiraiya: As you can see, you fail! Jiraiya the Toad Sage falls victim to no woman's charm! Rare beauties fall for me! When you reach the stature I have, the ladies worship at your awesomeness!''

Death Battle
(*Cues: Turtle and Toad - Werewolf Therewolf)

Master Roshi arrives at a book and scroll store which Jiraiya appears to be selling his famous novels in. He begins looking around the shop.

Roshi: Ooh, this store's really close by, I don't know why I missed it.

Jiraiya: Who's this geezer?

Roshi: Hey fuzz for brains!

Roshi arrives at Jiraiya's desk holding one of his adult novels.

''Roshi: Where are the pictures!? It's just words in here!''

Roshi tosses the novel on the ground and begins stomping on it, unintentionally upsetting the author in front of him.

''Jiraiya: Pictures!? You fool! Words paint a thousand beautiful pictures all by themselves!''

The Toad Sage leaps in the air ready to engage in combat with the Turtle Hermit.

FIGHT!

Jiraiya begins by tossing three kunai at his opponent. Roshi dodges one of them and uses his staff to bat away the other. The ninja then comes in and tries punching and kicking the old master and eventually manages to toss Roshi aside using his hair into a bookshelf.

''Roshi: Geez, don't take it personally! Not like you wrote the damn thing!''

Jiraiya: But I did!

Jiraiya starts spinning around and sends multiple of his hair towards Roshi. Roshi leaps upwards and uses his staff to aim a charged book towards Jiraiya. The Sanin avoids the book and jumps forward to punch Roshi once more, but Roshi pushes him back towards the door. Jiraiya then slams his hand on the ground and causes the bookstore to shift to the inside of a toad's body.

Roshi tries to move forward, but the sticky floor immobilizes him.

Roshi: The heck is this!?

Jiraiya: You're stuck now, baldy!

As the stomach floor begins to bring the hermit down, Roshi starts charging his iconic technique.

Roshi: Kamehame...

Roshi is completely taken into the sticky ground as he is still preparing his attack. Jiraiya sighs in relief, thinking the fight's over.

Jiraiya: Whew!

However, the old master then sticks his hands from the floor and launches his beam.

Roshi:...ha!

A startled Jiraiya uses Needle Jizō to shield himself from the blast. Suddenly on a beach, a frog explodes with the two older masters emerging from the dust. Roshi stumbles on his face before getting back on his feet while Jiraiya lands without issue.

Jiraiya: Shadow Clone Jutsu!

Jiraiya sends multiple clones to attack the old pervert, but Roshi easily takes them out with his moves. He then launches another Kamehameha towards the sea. One clone gets caught in the blast while the main one appears to avoid it. The Toad Sage then uses the Toad's Oil Bullet technique to cover the sand with oil. Two of Jiraiya's clones toss explosive kunais at Roshi, who frantically avoids the weapons.

The Jiraiya who covered the beach leaps in front of the fleeing Roshi and kicks him into the flames before following up the attack with his signature technique.

Jiraiya: Rasengan!

Using the ball of energy, Jiraiya pushes Roshi across the water all the way to the hermit's home, Kame House. He launches the older brawler into one of the building's walls before preparing his next move.

Jiraiya: Summoning Jutsu!

Gamabunta suddenly appears in the sky and lands on top of Kame House.

''Gamabunta: Jiraiya, you buffoon! What's this about?''

''Jiraiya: Hey there! Can you buy me some time?''

Jiraiya puts his hands together and prepares his next move.

''Gamabunta: What!? I'm not your servant, I'm the Chief Toa...woah!''

Now in his Max Power Form, Roshi lifts the giant toad with one arm.

Roshi: Get...off...my...LAWN!

Roshi launches the gargantuan amphibian high into the sky. Gamabunta quickly turns around and launches his counter attack.

Gamabunta: Water Style: Liquid Bullets!

Roshi grabs a nearby container with an ofuda seal on it and warps behind the Chief Toad.

Gamabunta: He's a quick one...

The two warriors land back on the island. Roshi opens the container and lifts up his arms.

Roshi: Evil Containment Wave!

Gamabunta's massive body gets sucked into the small container.

Gamabunta: Screw you, you pervert!

Jiraiya is shocked to see his ally captured so easily. Roshi then turns around to face his opponent.

Roshi: Only a coward lets others do their fighting for them!

The God of Martial Arts then punches the Sannin in the gut, but Jiraiya smiles in response.

''Jiraiya: You have no idea... I've been back on the beach the whole time!''

The shadow clone disappears to Roshi's shock. Back on the beach, the real Jiraiya has entered Sage Mode with Fukasaku and Shima on his shoulders. The two old masters prepare their ultimate techniques.

Roshi: Kame...

Jiraiya: Rasengan!

Roshi: ...hamehameha!

Jiraiya starts running on the water with his Ultra Big Ball Rasengan to negate Roshi's Kamehameha. Roshi suddenly vanishes when the Toad Sage starts getting closer to the island and appears behind Jiraiya.

Roshi: Gotcha!

Roshi starts charging with his fist forward as the two toads on Jiraiya's shoulders begin croaking loudly. The Turtle Hermit finds himself mentally trapped by their Genjutsu, the Demonic Illusion: Toad Confrontation Chant.

Jiraiya: You old fool, I can't believe you fell for that!

Jiraiya walks forward in the illusion wielding his Stone Sword.

Jiraiya: Let's end this!

However, in the real world, the genjutsu did not slow down the momentum of Roshi's punch. Roshi still unknowingly dashes forward and punches Jiraiya so hard it splits the Pervy Sage's body in half. In the genjutsu, Jiraiya's body starts bleeding as he begins to feel the impact of the punch.

Jiraiya: Wha..what!?

Roshi suddenly awakens from the illusion right before landing in the water. He turns around and sees his opponent's blood trailing behind him. He then makes a peace sign at the camera and starts giggling.

KO!

Results
Boomstick: Talk about a "hole" new way to win!

Wiz: Jiraiya was certainly one of the most powerful warriors of his own world, but there's no question that Roshi's sheer might outclassed him.

Boomstick: One guy can break a mountain, the other can break a moon, so that was pretty obvious.

Wiz: The speed comparison wasn't quite so clear cut, though. While his unseen battle with Krillin was incredibly quick, Roshi's never personally shown speeds as fast as the lightning feats Jiraiya's scaled to.

''Popup: While Roshi regularly drains his own energy, Jiraiya can draw more from his surroundings with Senjutsu. However, the instability of Sage Mode and Roshi's enormous power make unlikely Jiraiya's chakra reserves could reliably surpass Roshi's Ki.''

'''Boomstick: But he did hold his own in the Tournament of Power against planet and galaxy busters. Also, in Goku's training right after Korin's, he actually had to dodge lightning. Roshi's own training didn't stop after chasing the kitty around, and neither did his kitty chasing. So, scaled to Goku's progress, it makes sense that he'd be able to match Jiraya's speed, and probably even surpass it.'''

''Popup: Jiraiya has some moves which could possibly defeat Roshi instantly, such as his Turning Into A Frog technique. However, these abilities are few and far between, require special circumstances, and/or are too-ill defined to base an entire victory argument around. Roshi's speed and cleverness can also counter many of these techniques.''

Wiz: Still, it would be reasonable to believe Jiraiya could use his tactical talent to outsmart and outlast Roshi.

Boomstick: Except, Roshi's a smart fighter too, not only does he have way more experience thanks to his super age, but he's got an eye for traps and sticky situations, like when he figured out the illusion powers of the talisman fighter Dercori.

Wiz: And remember, it took only fifteen seconds for Roshi's Kamehameha to reach the moon. Given the moon's distance of over 200,000 miles from the surface of the Earth, this means that the beam must have traveled over fifty seven million miles per hour, more than 260 times faster than lighting, there was no way Jiraiya could avoid Roshi's trademark move for very long.

''Popup: Roshi has more at his disposal than muscles and energy blasts. His hypnosis, mind reading, and pressure points provide plenty of options to counter Jiraiya's own esoteric abilities.''

Boomstick: Sure, Jiraiya might be a crafty ninja, but all that doesn't boil down to much more than tricks against someone like Roshi.

Wiz: Roshi was simply faster, stronger, and had way more experience.

Boomstick: And that’s why Jiraiya croaked when Roshi beat him to the punch.

(Boomstick Punches Wiz, causing him to fall to the floor)

Wiz: The winner is Master Roshi.

Trivia

 * The connections between Master Roshi and Jiraiya is that they are two of the most iconic elderly martial arts masters in anime who happen to be massive perverts and whose symbol is an animal (turtle in the case of Roshi and toad in the case of Jiraiya. They also trained their series’ protagonists (Goku and Naruto respectively), while not to their current peak of strength, to an important level.
 * This can be considered the second Turtle VS Toad episode, after Zitz VS Leonardo
 * This is the sixth episode to feature an anime character fighting against another anime character, after Zoro VS Erza, Natsu VS Ace, Lucario VS Renamon, Naruto VS Ichigo and Jotaro VS Kenshiro.
 * This is the 17th company themed Death Battle, after Goomba VS Koopa, Haggar VS Zangief, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Battle Royale, Starscream VS Rainbow Dash, Zelda VS Peach, Pokémon Battle Royale, Ragna VS Sol Badguy, Beast VS Goliath, Darth Vader VS Doctor Doom, Bowser VS Ganon, Ratchet & Clank VS Jak & Daxter, Meta VS Carolina, Naruto VS Ichigo, Jotaro VS Kenshiro, Crash VS Spyro and Leon Kennedy VS Frank West.
 * This is the Sixth time Boomstick Parodies a song (This time being the TMNT theme) the first five were Felicia VS Taokaka (SatAM Sonic the Hedgehog), Batman VS Spider-Man (1960's Spiderman Theme), Shao Kahn VS M. Bison (Captain Planet and the Planeteers), Pokémon Battle Royale (Original Pokémon theme), and Godzilla VS Gamera (Gamera Theme)